As Season 10 begins, we are watching the auditions faithfully but won't do much commentary until at least Hollywood week, maybe not until the semifinals, just as we did in Season 9.

However, we will say that so far, we're happy with the fact that the good auditions are outweighing the bad (good move, Idol, keep it up) and also like the new intro and improved logo a bit better. Jury's still out on Steven Tyler, not sure if we can stomach a whole season of that...that. We'll see.

Finally! The top 24 season 9 contestants have been thoroughly stressed, strung along, and strained to within an inch of their lives by Idol producers and then told they get to experience the overwhelming pressure for at least another week—about 14 more weeks for the eventual winner. What fun!

Here they are:

GIRLS
Didi Benami
Crystal Bowersox
Lacey Brown
Michelle Delamor
Katelyn Epperly
Siobhan Magnus
Paige Miles
Ashley Rodriguez
Lilly Scott
Katie Stevens
Haeley Vaughn
Janell Wheeler

GUYS
Lee Dewyze
Andrew Garcia
Tyler Grady
Todrick Hall
Casey James
Aaron Kelly
Alex Lambert
Michael Lynche
Joe Munoz
John Park
Jermaine Sellers
Tim Urban

The producers all get rated at Litterbox Level tonight, just because we're annoyed by how long these results were dragged out.

But we're looking forward to next week and the first performance show! Be there or be square!

(Aired 2/16/10)

Two hours of Idol, 7 contestants into the top 24. That's 3.5 contestants per hour. At this rate, the rest of them will be over 28 before they find out their fate, which will be that they aren't going through, because they're over 28.

Anyway, so far we know that 2 girls and 5 guys have landed spots:

Todrick Hall
Katelyn Epperly
Didi Benami
Aaron Kelly
Lee DeWyze
Casey James
Michael Lynche

How did the judges do?

RATING SYSTEM

Litterbox Level

Paws-itively Purr-fect

They’re being evaluated on the basis of their constructive criticism, coherence, and entertainment value.

Randy

Ellen

Kara

Simon

Tomorrow, we supposedly find out who the other 17 are. No doubt they'll be whizzed by us so fast we won't be able to keep up. It's feast or famine with this show.

See you soon!

(Aired 2/9 and 2/10)

Season 9 is finally rolling, although we at Predict Idol feel that it REALLY starts with the top 24. But Hollywood week is definitely an essential part of the process.

However, since contestants aren’t being eliminated one by one, or even two by two, it’s almost impossible to make predictions that have any meaning. So for the time being, the Prognosticats are simply going to rate the judges for their performance as judges, and they will continue to do this throughout the season along with their regular predictions.

There will be somewhat of a format change here at Predict Idol. For the last couple of years, we have written fairly extensive reviews and commentary of the performances, making our human predictions and the cats making theirs (by having them “choose” at random from scraps of paper, each with a contestant’s name).

We have established that, as poor as we humans are at accurately predicting the outcome each week, the cats are even worse. So this year the cats will be pitted against one another in a fight to the death. Or to the tuna, in this case. (Whether their predictions continue to be random or influenced by the humans remains to be seen.)

So here’s how the judges fared this week using our 4-paw rating scale:

RATING SYSTEM

Litterbox Level

Paws-itively Purr-fect

They’re being evaluated on the basis of their constructive criticism, coherence, and entertainment value.

Randy

Ellen

Kara

Simon

We'll see you again next week for more Hollywood hijinks!

Aired 2/10/09

In this phase of Hollywood week, the 72 remaining contestants will sing with a band, backup singers, and if they choose, their own instruments. Tonight they perform, and tomorrow night, the top 36 is revealed. The judges will not give feedback on tonight's performances.

Adam Lambert is first, and he’s doing Cher’s “Believe,” as a ballad, no less. I’m sorry, I just don’t like him. His voice is too high and shrill.

Matt Giraud reminds Simon of Elliott Yamin. I’m ready to hate him because there’s only one Elliott. But he does a really good job, accompanying himself on piano.

Danny Gokey and Jamar Rogers are stressing. Jamar sings “Hey There Delilah.” I’m not crazy about the style, but at least he does something different with it. Danny does “I Hope You Dance.” Wow, the unexpected song choices tonight! I don't think it’s the best song for him, but I still like his voice.

Anoop Desai is up. Like. Jorge Nunez. Don't like. Scott MacIntyre plays piano. I'm on the fence with him. I think his voice wavers off pitch too much.

Kendall Beard sings a Carrie Underwood song. Not a good idea, although I liked her during the original audition in spite of the fact that we only heard half a second at the time. Stevie Wright sings Colbie Caillat, sounds good. Lil Rounds oversings something again.

Kristin McNamara sings Kelly Clarkson. Another bad idea; she can't carry it off. Mishavonna Henson got cut during Hollywood week last year and is back to try again. She's good. And she gets the award for the most unusual female name this year, Anoop being the male, although it's possible it's not so unusual given his heritage.

They're wasting more screen time on nettlesome Tatiana Del Toro. She's absolutely convinced of her own genius. I'm not sure she's running on her own steam... Alexis Grace also does “Before He Cheats.” Iffy. Kenny Hoffpauer is okay. Jasmine Murray sings “Tattoo,” which I don’t think is a good enough song for her.

Nathaniel Marshall plays guitar. He’s not bad but if he sticks around there will no doubt be more drama. Joanna Pacitti totally blows the lyrics. Totally. Casey Carlson is nearly as bad. Stephen Fowler was up all night rehearsing. He plays the piano and forgets the lyrics of David Cook’s “Time of My Life”—twice. Ryan reminds us of Brooke White’s do-over last year. Poor Stephen just gives up and walks off stage. That was weird.

And we’re back to Tatiana. She is summoned from the room where she was placed; apparently the judges are reconsidering where they put her. She eventually gets switched to another room. Understandably, nobody’s happy to see her walk in.

Nick Mitchell decides to continue with the “Norman Gentle” persona. Supraz, supraz. He just can’t help himself, I guess. He gives us a whiny, wavery “Georgia On My Mind.” Paula, of course, loves it, and Randy is har-har-ing. Please put him in a room with Tatiana and open the trapdoor in the floor. Please.

Anne Marie Boskovich now worries whether she played it too safe, being that she's in the same room with Nick/Norman. After hearing her sing again, I’m not sure she has the chops. Ju’not Joyner, whom I can’t recall seeing before, does okay.

Kaylan Loyd’s audition doesn’t go too well. Simon actually stops her, which doesn’t seem fair. She sings Sara Bareilles and sounds pretty good to me. Kai Kalama played the guitar; his voice is feeling the strain. Michael Sarver (who has either dropped the Jeremy as quickly as it came, or else Fox is not sure what his name is). It seems to me like he forgot a few words, but I’m not sure and I don’t feel like rewinding.

It’s time to find out which rooms are going on and which are getting ejected. Simon has jetted off to London, leaving the other three to break the news to room 2, the one with Nathaniel Marshall, Jasmine Murray, Alex Wagner-Trugman, Von Smith, Joanna Pacitti, Stephen Fowler, Alexis Grace, Casey Carlson, Kai Kalama, Arianna Afsar, and Michael Sarver, among others. They are IN, despite the fact that most of the lyric-forgetters are in here.

India Morrison doesn’t do too well solo. She’s in Leneshe Young’s room, which hears the cheering from room 2. Michael Castro is there, as is the girl who looks like Jordin Sparks, and Kaylan Loyd. They are OUT, going home.

Two rooms to go. Room 1, with Danny Gokey, Stevie Wright, Frankie Jordan, Kristin McNamara, Matt Giraud, Adam Lambert, Kendall Beard, Anoop Desai, Scott MacIntyre, Jamar Rogers, Lil Rounds, Jorge Nunez, and Jackie Tohn is ... IN!

Now room 4 has heard two rooms scream. It would appear that doesn’t bode well for them, but if TPTB cut it down to 36 tonight, what would we do tomorrow night? Matt wants to hear it straight up, and Paula tells them they’re also IN. This room includes a whimpering Tatiana Del Toro (so much for the trap door), Anne Marie Boskovich, Cody Sheldon, Matt Breitzke, Ju’not Joyner, Nick Mitchell, Felicia Barton, and TK Hash.

Tomorrow night is the elevator/chair episode. It appears they have upgraded the chair quite a bit. At least 18 of them will get the bad news in comfort and style. See you then!

Aired 2/4/09

The agonizing melodrama that is American Idol Hollywood week continues at the Kodak Theatre. Ryan uses the word bloodbath again when describing the brutal cuts that will be made on tonight's show. The contestants provide more than enough drama; they don't need to beat us over the head with it.

Speaking of drama, the queen herself, Tatiana Del Toro, lays it on thick tonight. It feels like most of the episode is devoted to her and her group's woes. In fact, she switches back and forth between two groups, thereby alienating both. Incidentally, one of the girls in her original group strongly resembles Jordin Sparks. The other major skirmish of the night occurs in Team Diva, the group that includes Rose Flack and B.G. I can't even stand to type out her nickname anymore. I'm not even bolding her initials. Will someone please tranquilize Simon so that she won't get through another round?

Nancy Wilson, in the second group that Tatiana discards, is a little angry. No, she's a lot angry. I can understand her irritation with the Dramatic One, but this girl needs to LIGHTEN UP. They name their group Team Compromise. Huh?!?!? Not that the name matters, and of course, compromise can be good, but it just seems a little hesitant.

B.G. goes to bed before her group is done rehearsing and cries to her roommate. (FOX, it's not "roomate.") Rose and the other two girls—one of which is Jasmine Murray but I don't remember the other—aren't sure what to do. And over at Team Compromise, Nathaniel Marshall is having a meltdown of his own. Each one of them is wailing about how the other two are going to ruin their dream because of the fighting. These people have no social skills whatsoever. Sigh. And Nancy, yeah, I was serious about the therapy. Right away.

In the morning, Team Diva is missing one member—you'll never guess who! She is found still sleeping, not feeling good because she only got two hours of sleep. Pardon me while I grab a super-size Kleenex. They decide to go on without her, until she shows up at the last minute, pout intact, with a demand to be shown what she missed. This girl makes Paris Hilton look like Laura Bush.

Action Squad, which includes The Hyphenated Ones, Emily Wynne-Hughes and Alex Wagner-Trugman, is having trouble with their choreography. Do the judges really care about the moves? Why do they put so much attention on the dancing and the personality clashes and not so much on the singing? What is this, America's Best Dance Crew?

Team Diva claims to have settled their differences. We'll see.

Simon warns the approximately 100 contestants that if they forget the words, they're out. No pressure.

The group White Chocolate, which includes rapper India Morrison, start things off with a bang. Their act is polished and their singing is good. They are all moving on.

Austin Sisneros sings about doo-doo. Shelby Swartwood sings about hay and fo-fum. Julissa Veloz and Nick Mitchell are in a group who have never heard of melody. Painful. However, the guys, including Jorge Nunez, are moving on. The girls have to say goodbye.

Action Squad falls apart and sing only the last two words of each line, and in the wrong order, so the endings don't even rhyme. Alex and Anne Marie Boskovich make it through, Emily and Ryan Something do not. Emily smiles through her tears. Ryan thinks Paula is evil.

Simon wants a crate of Advil in the afternoon because of the excruciating, horrible, chaotic, messy, useless performances. Fortunately, Danny Gokey's and Jamar Rogers' group is here to save the day. They all get yeses, even though Simon makes them sweat first.

Jeremy Michael Sarver, Adam Lambert, Matt Breitzke, and a few others I have lost track of get praise from the judges. However, I don't think I could listen to Adam very long; his voice is so sharp I'm losing blood here.

Team Diva is trying to pull it together. Rose forgets the words. NOOO!!! After all that, she's the one who screws up? The only one who really shines is Jasmine. Poor put-upon B.G. touts her sob story once again. She has been in heels all day and then didn't get much sleep. Isn't she a model? Isn't wearing heels, like, you know, part of what models do? Oh, and she has scoliosis so her back was hurting. I'm waiting for her to tell us her parents died even more recently than Rose's did. Plus her dog got run over by a truck. And she lives in her Lexus. She needs sleep. She needs music. She needs to go away. And she does! (Until the finale, of course, when all the obnoxious contestants get more stage time.) WOO-HOO! Rejoicing by normal people everywhere ensues. Jasmine is the only one to survive, and she deserves to, but I'm sorry to see Rose go. I wonder how much of her dismissal was because of the group and how much was her talent level.

Other promising contestants who get splattered in the "bloodbath" are David Osmond and Deanna Brown (WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!) I know many people were pinning hopes on her, including me.

Tatiana's group sings rather poorly, and they're pretty sure it's going to be bad news, but they are all safe. This is crazy. Out in the hall Tatiana, tears streaming, thanks everyone everywhere for everything they ever did, ever, in a most annoying way. Nancy, make some room on that couch for TDT.

Team Compromise is last. They pray before going onstage. It doesn't work. Nathaniel displays some Noriegish moves. Nancy is in a different key. Kristin McNamara hits some high notes that are a little harsh. Simon thinks they sabotaged each other when singing backup. Kristin reaches out to Nancy and gets rebuffed. The same happens to Nathaniel after Nancy is the only one to get the boot. She gets bleeped during her last words to Kristin on her way out. What class.

Another interesting auditioner who gets cut is Melinda Camille. She won't get to inspire the world after all. At least not this way.

I really wish they would get rid of the group singing once again. Last year was so nice. If these people wanted to sing in groups, they'd have started barbershop quartets. I know it shows how they get along with others, and that's important, but I can't help but feel that a few contestants didn't get a fair shake because they ended up in a melee not of their own making. Anyway, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

About 75 people get to continue. Next week, it's the rooms cut and then the elevator cut to give us our final 36. See you then!

Aired 2/3/09

The previews for American Idol's Hollywood week were so overly dramatic I'm not sure whether I'm going to enjoy it or not. The group singing is back, which is not good news to me. Either way, here are some of our impressions of the first Hollywood episode, where the hopefuls strut their stuff without accompaniment.

One of this year's twists: "Idol Boot Camp" is held before the auditions. Makeovers for everyone! But where's Tyra? The contestants also have voice coaches and a surprise mentor: Barry Manilow is back to guide the young'uns. And each year, fewer and fewer of them know who he is.

As in previous years, half go sightseeing, half take the stage in groups of 8 to sing. And that's it—they're in or they're out. Just like that. No second chances like last year.

Lil Rounds belts Whitney a cappella. It seems a little much to me, but the female judges are on their feet. Then Dennis Brigham sings with a deer-in-the-headlights look that is quite comical, unbeknownst to him. He ends up in the line that gets cut. And he shows that he is entirely devoid of class. He thinks America will be mad that he was eliminated. Sorry, Dennis, getting to Hollywood does not mean that you are an instant celebrity, loved by millions. Uh-uh.

Uh-oh, Frankie Jordan appears to be in trouble; she overcooked something. The judges say it's been a rough start. Nathaniel Marshall doesn't look like an idol, but he has a really nice voice. However, he's fallen into the trap of singing something that means something to him personally rather than something that will impress the judges. Then he gets weepy and kind of creepy. And what's with the darling little headband and the weird piercings? It just looks like he's a sloppy eater.

Anoop Desai is next. I like this kid. Jasmine Murray is a gasper, but she's good. And Rose Flack is charming as always but not feeling confident. She does Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay very well. I'd like to see a sing-off of that song between her and Deanna Brown. Fortunately, this entire group (which includes Jason Castro's brother, Michael) is through the first hurdle, yay!

Stephen Fowler is up. Very nice. Jorge Nunez next. Also nice. Von "Over the Top" Smith, sans hat, sings next. He's a good singer but really hard to watch. I'm afraid I disliked him originally and still do. All three get through.

Debra Byrd's advice to pick a song that reflects how they see themselves as recording artists seems to go over the contestants' heads. Or maybe the way these people see themselves is out of touch with reality. I have a firm grasp on the obvious.

Oh boy. Here comes Nick Mitchell (Norman Gentle). He's still entertaining but still not that good in my opinion. He gets through again, though. Scott MacIntyre and Frankie Jordan also make it. (Wait, I thought she was already through? The way they edit this I can't keep track.)

The next day, the other half is ready to go and the first half goes out on the town. Jackie Tohn is actually kind of funny. Her performance is way too Amanda Overmyer for me, but I can't help but like her. She makes it.

BFFs Danny Gokey and Jamar Rogers are singing today. Jamar does well. Danny does "Kiss From a Rose." I like him, and Paula is standing. Both of them are going through.

Ick, Bikini Girl, Katrina Darrell, is still hanging around? This time she's wearing a black garbage bag. Okay, not really, but that's what it looks like. She disses Kara again. Simon is still under her spell, making excuses for her that he would never make for anyone else. It would have sounded better with music?!?! I thought the idea of this was to find out how they do without music as a crutch. Music is what made her want to sing in the first place? Yathink? Paula and Kara say no, the guys say yes. Hmm, yeah, didn't see that coming.

Bad news: Jessica Furney doesn't make it! I was really hoping she would. Neither does Sharon Wilbur or Patricia Roman. However, Jeremy Michael Sarver does well and gets a yes. Jesus Valenzuela, who somewhat resembles Colin Farrell, follows him, and gets a no.

David Osmond and Erika Wesley are in the next group. So is Emily Wynne-Hughes, who has been practicing one song, but for some reason she sings one she didn't rehearse. The judges don't like it. Alex Wagner-Trugman, the one who sings in the closet with the mold, David Osmond, and Emily step forward, among others not mentioned, and get good news. Erika won't accept it and asks for a second chance. Even the fact that it's her husband's birthday doesn't sway them. Not relevant, honey.

Alexis Grace, Brent Keith Smith, Anne Marie Boskovich, and Adam Lambert get through.

Tune in tomorrow for more tears, jeers, and cheers!

(aired 1/30/09)

American Idol is packing two cities into their last audition episode in only one hour, so we're moving fast. The quicker we get to Hollywood week, the better.

A confident Adeola Adegoke has quit her job because she believes in herself that much. Simon calls her boss and gets it back for her since she's not going anywhere.

Jorge Nunez has a really good voice. He sings in Spanish. Paula requests a song that she can understand, but unfortunately he doesn't know the Barney song. I kid. He sings in English, they all like him and he's in.

Jessika Baier's family has already made signs like the ones you see in the audience in the top 12 performance shows. She attempts Celine Dion and ... oh, dear. Her yelling seems to be on pitch, but it's still yelling and it's not pleasant to listen to. All that poster board will have to be repurposed.

Melinda Camille wants to uplift humanity with her singing and be a part of the universe shifting. And she dances naked. Not at the audition, thank goodness. I am expecting a massive fail. However, she can sing. Four yeses.

Entertainment is all Jackie Tohn has ever known. I like her voice; it's different. She's like a kinder, gentler Amanda Overmyer. She's in.

Kate Cassidy, Carlos Santos, Antyon Smith, Jasmine James, and Mike Perlman are shown in quick succession. It appears Jasmine thinks this is a tap-dancing competition. None of them are going to the next round.

Joel Contreras, the human iPod/GuyPod, gets four nos. It appears that's what he was aiming for, judging by his loud rejoicing in the hallway. Not one to pass up a chance to get soaking wet for absolutely no reason, he jumps in the pool.

Nick Mitchell, aka "Norman Gentle," is entertaining but not particularly good at singing, although his rendition of Amazing Grace is passable, at least at first. And so the blessing and yessing to marginal contestants continues.

Ashley Hollister, Kenny Hoffpauer, and Kendall Beard appear and disappear so quickly, I barely have time to catch their names. They're all going to Hollywood.

More contestants who don't make the grade: Nicole Laraway, Mark Granata, and Michael Sconiers.

Cute Monique Garcia Torres, 16, brings her cute 9-year-old brother, Christopher, who gives a broken seashell to the judges. Monique has a good voice, but it's not good enough for Randy and Kara. Fortunately for her, the other two characters behind the table are feeling more magnanimous in spite of the weak bribe.

Oh boy. Here comes Alexis Cohen, the scary, sparkly girl from last season's auditions. She limited the sparkle to her dress this time, but the scary is still there. She can't sing worth a hoot, nor can she refrain from displaying her inborn crassitude. (I realize that's not a real word.) She is sent on her not-so-merry way again.

Patricia Lewis Roman doesn't impress the judges with her Whitney song, so she sings a few bars in Spanish. It changes Simon's mind, but not Paula's, who's probably still hoping someone will sing the Barney song. Nevertheless, she is given the go-ahead.

In all, 9 golden tickets are awarded in Puerto Rico and 26 in New York City.

PREDICTIONS

Bunny: I like Jackie Tohn and despite the brief airtime, Kendall Beard.

Burke: I'll go with Melinda Camille and Patricia Lewis Roman as the most likely to succeed.

Prognosticats: We'll take Jackie Tohn and Melinda Camille.

Next week, we're on to Hollywood! We hope you join us!

(aired 1/28/09)

Bunny: Tonight we're in Salt Lake City, which appears to be a very polite town. Let's get into the reviews.

David Osmond (yes, THAT Osmond), son of Alan, has multiple sclerosis like his father. Will his experience in a barbershop quartet as a kid help him? Yes, he is good. There's some artificial suspense and then...he emerges with a golden ticket.

Scary Tara Mathews says she knows when people are going to die. She must have been thinking of us, because her "singing" is killing us. The judges too.

Aleesha Turner, Katie Sullivan, and Rich Kagel are all train wrecks not worthy of comment.

Chris Kirkham is up next. He brings along his friend Greg, known as "Grabbit" because he is dressed as a fuzzy pink rabbit. His disturbing presence makes the whole thing a waste of time. Bye bye, cwazy wabbit.

Frankie Jordan is a stay-at-home mom. She's confident. Usually that's a bad sign. But she's surprisingly good with a pretty cool voice. Ryan makes the Frankie-goes-to-Hollywood joke before I have the chance.

Another mom, Megan Corkrey, auditions next. She sounds kind of like Adele (Chasing Pavement). She's unique, and she's going to Hollywood too.

Andrew Gibson can sing very low and very high, but not very well. Sorry, Andrew.

Austin Sisneros is auditioning to inspire people. He doesn't blow me away, but he's good in spite of his weird song choices. He gets four yeses.

Next is Jarrett Burns. Ryan introduces him using the word "brilliance," but I would say he's just okay. I'm assuming he got a golden ticket.

We meet Taylor Vaifanua. No way she's 16. And it's not her height; it's her face. She does act 16, though, so she's either a really good actress or she really is that young. Hollywood it is.

Rose Flack's father died when she was 13, and her mother when she was 15. She lives with her BFF's family. She looks and dresses, shall we say, eccentrically, but she's very cute. She sings in kind of a stiff-jawed way, but I like her. We'll be seeing her again.

There are 13 total from Salt Lake City with golden tickets.

PREDICTIONS

Bunny: I think the ones with the most potential are Frankie Jordan and Megan Corkrey.

Burke: I have to go with the two moms as well, Frankie Jordan and Megan Corkrey.

Prognosticats: We'll take Taylor Vaifanua and Megan Corkrey.

Tune in for the final audition show Thursday night and then check back here Friday for our reviews!

(aired 1/27/09)

Day One

Bunny: We're back this week, but it will have to be short and sweet. Let's get right to it.

Joshua Ulloa sings Marvin Gaye with lots of growling, finger-snapping, and Blake Lewis-style noises. He doesn't have a bad voice, and I guess the judges felt the same, because he's through to Hollywood.

Sharon Wilbur and her dog, Sasha, are auditioning next. She has a decent voice. Sharon's not bad either. Just kidding. But the singing is a little affected and all over the place. Even so, she's in.

Dana Moreno. Ouch. Hurts.

Next is Kaneswa Finnie. I'm expecting great things after that buildup from Mama, but it's not happening. Not even a little. Why haven't I learned? She is rejected, but at least she keeps smiling.

Miss Florida Latina USA, Julissa Veloz, sings Whitney. I'm expecting awfulness, but she's pretty good. Why on earth am I doing a prediction blog? It's a yes.

People-enjoyer Darin Darnell scopes out the competition by glad-handing every person in the holding room. His new buddy Devon doesn't make it past the judges, which takes the wind right out of Darin's sails and the good right out of his voice. The happy is gone.

Naomi Sykes' best friend gets a hug from her idol, Randy, and gets to sit on his lap while Naomi sings. Okay, may I say right here, Idol producers, I give, I give. I'll put up with the bad auditions. Just get rid of the ridiculous hijinks behind the judges' table. It's painful. Almost as painful as that high note. No to Naomi.

Nine tickets are given out on day one in Jacksonville.

Day Two

First up: Jasmine Murray sings "Big Girls Don't Cry," and it sounds karaoke to me because she has the same little voice idiosyncrasies that Fergie does. Which can be good or bad, depending on your perspective. The judges all like her.

George Ramirez is one of those earnest performers who you hate to criticize because they're so tender-hearted. But he is awful. I'm sure he has lots of other talents that he should develop. And is he really 18? I'd believe 28. Maybe it's the Merlin Olsen beard. All he wants is a simple house with nice floors. I like high aspirations in a man.

Anne Marie Boskovich doesn't show enough self-confidence for Simon's taste, so he tells her to come back a different person. A little later, she comes back as William Hung. Kidding again. She has more makeup on this time and has apparently taken a self-esteem class in the hallway. She has a good voice, and she's in.

T.K. Hash tries to tap into the magic of David Archuleta's performance of "Imagine" from last year. He tried out during Season 7 auditions and didn't make it. This year he does, despite Simon's no vote.

Bandanna boy Michael Perrelli is not allowed to use his guitar during the audition. This seems to be a last-minute surprise to him. He is terrified. He has kind of a bland voice and the judges aren't impressed. He's also a weeper. It's a no.

In total, 16 auditioners from Jacksonville get golden tickets.

P.S. To the producers, who will no doubt never, ever see this blog: I could do without the one-song montages by hundreds of people in quick succession. It pains me greatly.

Salt Lake City is coming up tomorrow night.

PREDICTIONS

Bunny: We aren't given much to choose from here, but I'll go with Julissa Veloz and Anne Marie Boskovich as having the most potential.

Burke: Same here—Julissa Veloz and Anne Marie Boskovich.

Prognosticats: We'll go out on a limb and say Jasmine Murray and Sharon Wilbur.