(aired 1/27/09)
Day One
Bunny: We're back this week, but it will have to be short and sweet. Let's get right to it.
Joshua Ulloa sings Marvin Gaye with lots of growling, finger-snapping, and Blake Lewis-style noises. He doesn't have a bad voice, and I guess the judges felt the same, because he's through to Hollywood.
Sharon Wilbur and her dog, Sasha, are auditioning next. She has a decent voice. Sharon's not bad either. Just kidding. But the singing is a little affected and all over the place. Even so, she's in.
Dana Moreno. Ouch. Hurts.
Next is Kaneswa Finnie. I'm expecting great things after that buildup from Mama, but it's not happening. Not even a little. Why haven't I learned? She is rejected, but at least she keeps smiling.
Miss Florida Latina USA, Julissa Veloz, sings Whitney. I'm expecting awfulness, but she's pretty good. Why on earth am I doing a prediction blog? It's a yes.
People-enjoyer Darin Darnell scopes out the competition by glad-handing every person in the holding room. His new buddy Devon doesn't make it past the judges, which takes the wind right out of Darin's sails and the good right out of his voice. The happy is gone.
Naomi Sykes' best friend gets a hug from her idol, Randy, and gets to sit on his lap while Naomi sings. Okay, may I say right here, Idol producers, I give, I give. I'll put up with the bad auditions. Just get rid of the ridiculous hijinks behind the judges' table. It's painful. Almost as painful as that high note. No to Naomi.
Nine tickets are given out on day one in Jacksonville.
Day Two
First up: Jasmine Murray sings "Big Girls Don't Cry," and it sounds karaoke to me because she has the same little voice idiosyncrasies that Fergie does. Which can be good or bad, depending on your perspective. The judges all like her.
George Ramirez is one of those earnest performers who you hate to criticize because they're so tender-hearted. But he is awful. I'm sure he has lots of other talents that he should develop. And is he really 18? I'd believe 28. Maybe it's the Merlin Olsen beard. All he wants is a simple house with nice floors. I like high aspirations in a man.
Anne Marie Boskovich doesn't show enough self-confidence for Simon's taste, so he tells her to come back a different person. A little later, she comes back as William Hung. Kidding again. She has more makeup on this time and has apparently taken a self-esteem class in the hallway. She has a good voice, and she's in.
T.K. Hash tries to tap into the magic of David Archuleta's performance of "Imagine" from last year. He tried out during Season 7 auditions and didn't make it. This year he does, despite Simon's no vote.
Bandanna boy Michael Perrelli is not allowed to use his guitar during the audition. This seems to be a last-minute surprise to him. He is terrified. He has kind of a bland voice and the judges aren't impressed. He's also a weeper. It's a no.
In total, 16 auditioners from Jacksonville get golden tickets.
P.S. To the producers, who will no doubt never, ever see this blog: I could do without the one-song montages by hundreds of people in quick succession. It pains me greatly.
Salt Lake City is coming up tomorrow night.
PREDICTIONS
Bunny: We aren't given much to choose from here, but I'll go with Julissa Veloz and Anne Marie Boskovich as having the most potential.
Burke: Same here—Julissa Veloz and Anne Marie Boskovich.
Prognosticats: We'll go out on a limb and say Jasmine Murray and Sharon Wilbur.
